Contest For Munchkin Fans!

Hokily pokily
Andrew the Munchkin Czar
Posted a contest for
All of his fans

Writing some smile-worthy
Nonsequitorial
Doggerel could win you
Loot for both hands!

The above is an example of a double dactyl. It's a form of light verse much like a limerick, but more difficult. Lines 1, 2, 3, 5, 6, and 7 form two dactyls*, with a stress pattern familiar to waltzers and polka-ers: OOM-pa-pa OOM-pa-pa. (For another example, see the title of this news item.) Lines 4 and 8 are choriambs, or dactyls with an extra stressed syllable at the end (OOM-pa-pa-OOM). These two lines must rhyme . . . or at least come close, as above.

As if the form weren't enough of a challenge, the content also has rules: Line 1 must be rhyming nonsense. Line 2 must be, in some form or other, a proper noun; usually, this is restricted to a person's name, but we're going to open it up a bit in this contest to include anything Munchkin-related. ("Thrice-damnèd Duck of Doom" would work, if I hadn't just used it myself.) Either line 6 or 7 must be a single hexasyllabic word. And, ideally, the poem as a whole is witty, if not actually amusing.

Your task is to write the ultimate Munchkin double dactyl and send it in by the deadline: Wednesday, June 15. I will pick an arbitrary number of winners in yet-to-be-determined categories and send those folks some cool Munchkin swag. Email them to me with the subject line "Double Dactyl" or just click here. I'm looking forward to seeing what y'all come up with!

* Etymological** trivia for you: "dactyl" comes from the ancient Greek work for finger, and is used because the pattern of stress mimics the knuckles of a finger: long and two shorts. It's cognate with Latin "digitus," whence we get "digits" . . . so counting by digits is literally counting on your fingers.
** There's another hexasyllable for you!